Dejected

I started this post Friday afternoon, but didn't get to post it because I had family visiting for the weekend, so I'm going to post it now and then continue it with today's post ...

This morning I was really really down.  My knee started hurting so badly during my run that I couldn't finish. I hurt a bit on Wednesday after I ran, but started feeling better later in the day and felt ok most of the day on Thursday, until later in the day. Last night when I was sitting on the plane it got pretty sore. I figured this was because I was jammed into those little damn seats (I don't fly enough to get the fancy seats up front). It was sore walking through the airport and a bit when I got home, but nothing unbearable.  This morning I went to the track and everything started fine.  I did my first 3 minute run, no problem, then during my 5 minute I was tired but no pain. But when I slowed to walk after that run, my calves tightened up and my knee started really hurting. I kept walking and hoped that it would fade again when I started running again. But when I started to run this time it hurt more than before. I tried to go on, but made it halfway around the track and had to start walking again. At this point I totally lost my motivation and when I got back to the gate i walked out. I sat on a bench for a little while with my water bottle pressed against my knee and my face in my towel.

Now all these thoughts started running through my head ... what am I going to do now?  Is this over before I even got started?  What else can I do to keep myself going?  Am I going to have to go buy a bike?

I drove home and iced my knee on the couch for a half hour then limped up the stairs to take a shower.  it hurt the most trying to climb stairs.  I was really disappointed and my wife tried to cheer me up, but I don't want to give up on running. I took some advil and by the time I got to work, it started feeling better.  There were twinges of pain throughout the day, and also some times when it didnt hurt at all.

OK, now back to today ...


I felt pretty bad all day Friday. My knee was sore, though not terribly so, but thoughts of being derailed so early on in my effort swam through my head. I know a ton of people start journey's like this and never make the end. I know I've done that in the past, but this time its too important to me to give up. I thought that maybe I'd take a couple of extra days between runs, running every third day and realizing that I won't be up to 30 minutes before the race on Oct. 2, but if I have to walk that weekend, I'll walk. There are races after that one too.  I had family visiting for the weekend, so that distracted me a bit.

Saturday morning I woke up feeling ok, took some Advil anyway and then had my first soccer practice with the kids. Its tough to wrangle 10 5 and 6 year olds to try to run drills, but we got through it and I think most of the kids had a good time. Cutting back and forth and kicking the ball to play with the kids made my knee ache, so that was kind of a bummer.

Sunday should be run day, but a combination of waking up with a sore knee, being out with the neighbors too late, drinking a bit too much and having my houseguests leave early in the morning kept me from running early.  Instead I went to the gym early in the afternoon and tried to run on the treadmill. I think I've mentioned before that I don't like the treadmill because the pacing is hard for me, but I thought it might be easier on my knees, plus its hot outside here in the afternoon.

I was able to get through the entire workout on the treadmill without too much pain. I still get some pretty wicked tightness when slowing from a run to walk, especially after the longer runs, but I was able to get through it. But, as soon as I was done the last run, the pain came on. I had to cut my cool down a little short. I went home and iced it again for a full 30 minutes and I started feeling better. Now its a few hours later and I can get around without limping, but if I keep the knee in the same position for a couple of minutes, its gets stiff.

I'm still not sure what I'm going to do. I think that I'll get up tomorrow and do some weights and the elliptical and see how I feel.  Then I'll take Tuesday off and try running again Wednesday morning. Then I'll run again Saturday and plan the next weeks from there.

On a high note, I got through all the runs today pretty well.  I was struggling a bit for the last one and I slowed the pace down a lot, but I finished.